Hookers aren't trustworthy? I'm shocked!

Somebody's a few fries short of a Happy Meal...

Man reports "theft by escort" to police

A Seattle man who hired an escort to "have fun" told police that she stole $170 from him after she went to her car to fetch some condoms.

The man, who is in his 50s and lives on Whitman Avenue North near Lake Union, had called the escort after spotting an advertisement in the Feb. 21 edition of The Stranger, a police report filed Thursday said.

The woman arrived at his apartment late last month for the rendezvous. He agreed to pay her $150 to "have fun" and $20 to cover her gas.

"At some point into the fun," the woman asked the man whether he had condoms, according to the report.

Upon hearing that he did not, she said she would get some from her car.

As the man waited for her to return, he looked out his window and realized the escort was driving away in a silver car.

Since that night, he has called her "numerous times" to get his money back. "But she has not answered or returned his calls," the report said.

The police officer who took the report told the man it is against the law in Seattle and the state of Washington to pay someone for sex.

But the man wanted to file a police report in case the woman "was doing this to more of her customers."

Whaddya mean I can't order a hooker?

Apparently, employers get upset when their staff members try and order prostitutes on the premises. Who knew??

DES MOINES, Iowa -- A judge has denied an Iowa man's claim that he shouldn't have been fired for repeatedly requesting help to procure a prostitute.

Neil Jorgensen, 62, of Kalona, worked at Riverside Casino and Golf Resort in Riverside and was given a gift certificate and free night's stay at the casino hotel to mark a year's employment.

After eating and drinking at a casino restaurant, he returned to his hotel room about midnight and later called hotel managers about hiring a prostitute. When managers refused to help him, he made a call to the adjacent resort and made the same request.

"The advertisement is that it's just like Las Vegas, so I thought I was in Las Vegas," Jorgensen testified at a hearing regarding his request for unemployment benefits.

Hotel workers were sent to Jorgensen's room to ask him to stop demanding prostitutes. When they arrived at his room, Jorgensen answered the door in the nude, human resources director Tim Donovan said.

Jorgensen was fired the next day.

At the hearing, Jorgensen said his actions didn't hurt the casino, and he said he'd received strong performance reviews. He also blamed the restaurant for serving him too much alcohol.

"I was absolutely plowed," he said.

Administrative Law Judge Terence Nice turned down Jorgensen's claim for unemployment benefits.